Renaissance Idiot's ramblings

Render by Author. Change always hits you from around the corner. It’s all smooth sailing to the goal till everything turns upside down. And then you have to have to stop pick up the pieces that remain and keep walking. Or sometimes change the goal because the said goal is impossible to reach now. It is demotivating and people will usually fall in a slumber or a pit of self-pity. For me it was my own self-hatred returning, It takes a long time to look myself in the mirror and blame myself for the situations that have come forward.  I know the person on the other side feels the same if not worse. Nevertheless, somewhere my heart does not want to acknowledge that. My heart takes for granted that it’s always more valid that it is the one that aches and nothing else. Is it romanticism then? That will make me be content with being miserable. Or is it the fact that somewhere, I have grown to think that to succeed in something, it really takes someone to be awful; either in his circumsta...

  Imagine, opening up your future newspaper, or before your youtube video starts, you see an advertisement, trying to sell you a prestigious ticket to become a member of a particular religion. "With the idea of Recycle and Reuse becoming popular, allow your soul to be a part of it by accepting Hinduism!!" Or on the contrary think of your favourite influencer/actor telling you how great Christianity is because you can wear a beautiful white gown and get married in a church, only at the price of accepting Christ as your lord and saviour.  All this sounds extremely ridiculous, far-fetched and maybe even insulting. Religions, are considered as pious and untouched guides to our morality and are famous for teaching its followers to be loyal to it. These being defined through centuries of human life on earth and also above it to answer what comes before and after it all. However, for an off chance, can they be commoditized ? and in turn be sold to you? For their inherent benefits?...

What makes something seem wrong? seem scary? or seem dark? I dont really have an answer for that. Sometimes, the general consensus answers it for me, expressing a particular piece is specially twisted or worse than the usual (in a good way ofcourse) Its funny how the whole exercise started, I always wanted to practice anatomy, get better in sketching. But instead of taking the typical path of drawing hundreds of eyes, hands in graceful positions or drawing famous faces; I chose this method, as it would've given me the same type of practice also any thing mangled or mutilated covered up my lack of skill. After more than 50 drawings, there has been an improvement, and has manifested my linear thought process of coming up with a certain pose, and then editing it to make it uncomfortable. Glaring errors usually make the drawings look really novice, even seem like cringy edgl0rd sketches.  It is amazing that a form that we are so well aware and used to knowing, seeing, feeling that too ...